Dating My Chinese Boyfriend Gangnam Style

Any of you who have read my previous post about all the awesome things my Chinese boyfriend taught me, will know that I like to praise my fish a little...or alot depending on my mood.

帅呆了!...and so innocent...

I do especially enjoy praising him for his efforts to learn English.

Back in June, when he walked alongside me, while I chatted away to Sally of UnbraveGirl (in English), he didn't understand a single word. Well, that's not true. He did understand a couple of words but nowhere near enough to make sense of what we were taking about. In a way this was just perfect because I could annoy Sally by telling her how much I liked him, knowing that even though he was close enough to take my hand, he didn't understand a single word.

Since then this has changed. I need to start being careful what I say when the fish is around. He studies every day, on top of working for nearly 12 hours - which by the way really deserves praise. The fish works seven days a week, weekends do not exist in his schedule. To make the effort to study a language on top of that deserves at the very least a whole bunch of respect.

I also really enjoy the fact that the fish asks me a lot of questions and genuinely wants to grasp the language. He repeats words over and over until his pronunciation is clear and easy enough to understand. We've gone from him not being able to pronounce "I want to eat dinner" to him being able to say it clearly and almost accent free.

He has also learned that telling me that he understood something when in fact he didn't won't get him far. He just doesn't get away with it. The ESL teacher in me always counters that answer with a cheeky question to check if he really understood what I taught him. These days he knows what's coming so he doesn't bother to cheat. Apparently losing face in front of your girlfriend is okay in Chinese culture...or he just loves me so much that he couldn't care less about letting me see his faults. Either way: aww!

Nevertheless, I recently was recently forced to endure what I can only describe as torture and that is saying something as my other half doesn't really manage to annoy me - not for long anyway. Those eyes! One look at them and I melt and give into everything! Before I fill you in on the facts, I do have to give you a little bit of background information.

I absolutely adore listening to my fish sing. His voice really isn't bad, he can keep a tune and if he's familiar with the rhythm of a song he has no problem keeping that too. I admit, the fact that I'm in love with the man makes me slightly biased, but I still insist that I am able to distinguish between liking the sound of someone singing and just saying that I do because I love said person. Which I wouldn't actually do, I prefer telling the truth. If I don't mean it you won't get flattering compliment from me, it's that easy.

Now. Because I like to listen to my fish sing I will often ask him to sing to me, sometimes he even does it out of his own accord. He knows I like it. Damn it, I tell you it's so easy to train Chinese boyfriends. Actually it's really easy to train my fish for I don't have any experience with other Chinese men. I'm  happy with the fish that I caught, he'll do nicely.

I've the kind of boyfriend who will voluntarily sing Wang Leehom songs to me - without batting an eyelid I may add. Yeah, take that! He wouldn't dream of saying "no". He knows I will sajiao (撒娇) until the end of time if he doesn't oblige and it seems that he has learned the one or other lesson from me too: If I do what my girlfriend wants I get off easy and have my peace. Wise man. Really, a very wise man. Don't tell him I said that.

Back to the torture. Sunday the 30th of September was the Mid-Autumn Festival in China and October 1st was National Day. This meant my darling other half had an entire week to himself where he didn't need to work (he did nevertheless...workaholic that he is) and could stay up late to have plenty of Skype dates with me. One of these Skype dates lasted for hours and at some point my fish started fooling around (as he usually does and I don't expect anything else from someone who has the attention span of a fish...pun intended). He started reciting Tang Dynasty poetry, followed by old English songs.

I managed to deal with Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" but I cracked up when he started singing the Backstreet Boys' "As Long As You Love Me". I briefly contemplated leaving him but then I looked into his eyes and realised I never could, wouldn't even want to try.

I changed my mind again when he subjected me to this:

Yes! This year's summer hit of the century. A widely debated parody with a weird horse dance and millions of hits on YouTube.

PSY. Gangnam Style. 강남스타일。江南style。

Need I say more? If you haven't heard of Gangnam Style...WHERE ON EARTH HAVE YOU BEEN?

K-POP at it's finest? Lowest? I'm not sure. Strangest? Weirdest? Where are my übersexy Korean boys that make me melt when they bust a move in their dance videos? I want them back. I like drooling over them or picturing them covered in chocolate...*cough* Sorry, did I say that out loud?

They're gone! Gone.

Apparently the whole world is doing it Gangnam Style now.

Not only did he make me listen to it again, no he also sang it! My fish DOES NOT speak Korean - his Korean was überbad and two thirds of it was totally incomprehensible, a bit like my Mandarin really, well maybe my Cantonese. As if this wasn't bad enough, he then got up and proceeded to demonstrate the dance to me. And the man tells me he's never said on the back of a horse.

I swear, I will never ever be able to unsee what I was forced to see. I'm scared for life.

I would like to note that I feel pretty indifferent towards Gangnam Style. I've no strong feelings towards it either way but..dear fish, please NEVER EVER do that to me again! There are limits to how much girlfriends can and should endure. Someone give me chocolate, please!