I've seen my fair share of both female and male doctors to know that the gender doesn't define the quality of the medical care provided. Why is it then that lately I only feel safe when I get treatment from one of the male doctors in the burns department?
Aside from the fact that he obtained his professorship in Australia and speaks English, the other doctors have, I think, been doing a good job.
Still it is him who gives me the feeling of safety and the ability to relax. I am not thrilled by his suggestion to undergo skin grafting surgery but it still doesn't diminish my trust in him.
Throughout the last month, whenever I went for my dressing change a female doctor attended to my wound. Some of the doctors didn't make me feel too good but that was because they were rushing too much and not listening to me properly. One of the doctors, she appears to be higher than the others, did always ensure to give me the proper care and time any patient deserves.
I met "my" professor by chance. He was doing his rounds two weeks ago and I happened to be at the clinic to get my bandage changed. What with being a foreigner I do stand out here in China so he came over to have a look and get some information about when, how and where I burned myself. At first I didn't know who he was but once he introduced himself and I realised that he speaks English I relaxed visibly. Now, I can communicate in Chinese without any major problems but his ability to speak English and pronounce medical terms correctly made me relax immediately.
The second time I met him he was worried about my wound and took over to prescribe a different kind of medication to help prevent a possible infection. He also took his time to answer my questions and that was enough for me to make up my mind. From that moment on I wanted him as my doctor and nobody else.
The third time I met him he laughed when my friend told him that "the last time we were here she kept asking for you and she was so upset when you weren't there". To make up for it "my" professor personally changed the dressing and he is now my full-time doctor. I asked for it and he also suggested it to keep the treatment consistent.
I appreciate him all the more for this but I still don't understand why I feel so safe whenever he takes care of me. Is it simply the fact that I'm a woman and he's a man? Is it that woman crave someone stronger than them to take care of them and hold them in times of need?
I think a great bunch of women might disagree with me there, disagree with the fact that we women need a man in our lives to make us feel safe but I can't help but stand my ground and insist that having a man in your life, taking care of you, makes many things better.
I realise that in terms of a debate/discussion this half-thought-through idea of mine could go into any direction. I'm the last person to tell anyone which job they should be doing, in my opinion a woman should be entitled to do any job she wants. In fact I don't even want to go into this because I think it is silly and senseless to categorise jobs by whether a man or a woman should be doing them.
Nethertheless I do feel much safer and more relaxed in the hands of "my" professor. Maybe it's the fact that he has a sense of authority about him, or the fact that I'm a daddy's girl and always had better relationships with men than with women. While I have some great female friends, there is really no denying that sometimes being around men is a lot more fun.
I have no definite answer to my own question but I've put it in writing / said it out loud, which is all I really wanted.